Why is nobody asking the really tough questions with regards to gay marriage? Namely, Why should ANYONE be allowed to marry? Alright you may call me an extremist. Why don’t we just give everybody who *wants* to marry so bad civil unions. And they should be happy with that! Better yet, if I were elected I would give every one a civil onion and then no one would go hungry. No in all seriousness, by outlawing marriage we can in one glorious moment eliminate the rampant adultery problem we have in this country. Half of all married couples cheat on their spouse. I say we get rid of this ancient and decrepit institution and arm the other half. This is America! Let us modernize. Marriage has been around since the golden age of Ur. Lets put our best minds to work on this problem. We can rebuild it, innovate. We have to put our back into this and beat the godless communists before they come up with something better. They have marriage. We don’t need it. Let their lousy civilization degrade under the iron boot of MONOGAMY.
We Shall Free Ourselves from the Shackles of the Europe and their Worthless Traditions. We Are Strong! WE SHALL OVERCOME!!
Prometheus has given us the fire; now let us burn down the forest! Amen.